Conference Report: SCBWI LA

You might recall that about six weeks ago I headed to Los Angeles for the annual conference of the Society of Children's Book Writers and Illustrators. It was exhilarating, exhausting, inspiring, entertaining, and an all-around great experience (despite the horror story of my three flights home, which I won't tell here except to say that it will be a cold day in Hell before I fly American Airlines if I have another choice).

And really, I meant to share some of the things I learned from the experience; for instance, if you want to place in the costume ball, "subtle and classy" is not the vibe you need. (Okay, the heart deely-bobbers are not exactly subtle, but I thought the dress was nice and the wings weren't over-the-top.) At first, I thought I might actually blog from the conference, as I did in New York in 2009. But I was taking a great workshop that was held all four days of the conference, and we had homework every night. I had no time or energy to blog during my scant free time.

So I thought, maybe I'll write something up the week I get back. After my misadventures getting home, though, I felt like I was playing catchup, and I kept putting it off. Now that it's September and I've barely had time to revise my manuscripts using information I learned, let alone sent out any queries to editors or agents I met there, I've had to admit defeat. You are not getting a detailed report of my experiences at the conference. There was a lot of esoteric writers' stuff anyway, although I'm sure everyone could appreciate the line, "if you chase trends [with your writing], the vampires win!"

But do not despair! I still have something special for you from the conference, and that is proof of my talent for bad puns. You see, at every SCBWI conference, they have joke contests. They give you a theme, you write a joke, and if they read it aloud in between sessions, you get a prize. And I won not one, but two prizes! Here was the theme: you are an editor who can travel through time and thus acquire a memoir by anyone in history. What is the title and who is the author?

My first winner was pretty tricky, as it was read aloud and it really works better visually, so you should be able to get it right off. The book? Abridged Too Far, by Noah Webster. (Of dictionary fame. Get it? Abridged dictionary. Get it? That's bad, we love words. Get—oh, never mind. The SCBWI director loved it.)

The next one came the next day in a flash of brilliance. Another bad pun, but easily figured out: A Farewell to Arms, by Venus DeMilo. Okay, you have to know your iconic art for that one, but writers are a smart crowd.

My last joke submission wasn't used, perhaps because it really described the challenge more than met it. The joke setup was that we had to choose one of six words that some say are inappropriate for a kids' book (like boobs, butt, booger), and write a sentence with a silly substitute. The challenge inspired a limerick:

An author was given a dare
To choose naughty words with more care
She didn't know what
Could fill in for "BUTT"
Oops! Pardon my French, "derriere."

That one wasn't a winner, but it was my favorite. Because really, I didn't "write" this limerick, it was more like it attacked me while I was trying to get to sleep and I had to write it down before it would leave me alone. And that, as much as anything else I can tell you, is a conference in a nutshell: inspiration even when you're exhausted and overworked and trying to sleep.

Crazy lady in NY, part II: Attack of the Numb Butt

So a full day at the SCBWI NY conference left me revved up. After writing my first post, I started adding to the latest chapter in my current project. I got caught up and kept writing past 10 pm, finishing around a page and half of new material. Since that's a good output for a regular day, I was quite pleased. Then it was up by 7:30, check out of the hotel early, check the bags and coats, and back up for more programs at 8:30.

We saw some great illustrations as they announced the winners of their portfolio showcase. Then we had a very amusing talk from Bruce Hale, author of the "Chet Gecko Mysteries," who started out by regaling us with a song! His speech was very specific on how to appeal to middle graders, and since that's an age group I'm starting to experiment with, I found it very helpful.

Next there was a panel of agents discussing the state of the industry. With the economy tanking, there have been layoffs and cutbacks in the publishing industry, but all four agents were hopeful that the children's market will stay strong. (After all, people may cut back on their lattes and dinners out, but who can deny a child a book?) They revealed some interesting insights into how agencies work with editors, and I remain convinced it would be a nice thing to have an agent to advocate for my work. (Now I just have to find an agent who loves my writing.)

Next, the SCBWI introduced their new DVD master classes, one on the picture book with Tomie DePaola, one on the novel with Richard Peck. Tomie (as everyone calls him) couldn't be there in person, but did call in via speaker phone so we could hear his joyful voice. Richard Peck did appear, and although his talk was brief, it was super inspiring. If you're my age, you may remember Peck for suspense novels like Are You in the House Alone?, but nowadays he mainly writes wonderful historical novels, like the Newbery Award-winning A Year Down Yonder. While I was at the conference, I picked up two of his books, and read the Civil War story The River Between Us on the plane ride home. It was a wonderful story, beautifully written, and I highly recommend it to readers of all ages.

It was almost lunchtime, I was getting peckish, and my butt was totally numb, but we had one last speaker: writer Jack Gantos, who's known for the "Rotten Ralph" and "Joey Pigza" series, among others. He was a last-minute substitute, but his speech was very funny and reminded us all about why we become writers: because we love to read.

I made it back without any travel interruptions, feeling tired and inspired. Now I have to get back to work and turn that inspiration into something great.

Crazy lady in New York

So I made it into New York without any transportation troubles, and have made it through a fun day of free time and a full day of conference events. So far it's been fun. Some highlights of my days:

Friday: I get in on time (yay!) and walk 30 blocks to this specialty paper store I love. I'd asked the concierge about how long that distance was (hoping for an answer in miles) and she told me 30 minutes. Great, I said, I like to walk and can use the exercise. "But you might find it a little cold," she warned. I just laughed. After almost three straight weeks of Michigan temps below freezing, including a few days below zero, I laughed. It's in the 30s here, and by the time I reached my goal I was almost sweating.

Later that afternoon I head over to the "world's biggest store," the NYC branch of Macy's. I have a gift card, and some time to squander, so I wander the two floors of shoes. I find some on sale, to replace the nasty worn out clogs I use for bad weather. Yay! I defy any woman not to have her mood lifted by shoes on sale. On my way out, I see that the store has a special guest promoting a perfume. It's Irish actor Jonathan Rhys Meyers, whom I remember from the BBC series "Gormenghast" in 2000, but who's better known now for Showtime's "The Tudors." There's a big crowd, but I decide to swing by to see if he's as good-looking in person as he is on TV. I don't get more than 20 feet away, but it's close enough: the answer is yes. (I later meet a guy at the conference who saw Renee Zellweger entering the stage door at Letterman this week. He said yes, she looked good in person, too.) I've been in New York less than six hours and I have a celebrity spotting! I meet my roommate for dinner and have really good Indian food to celebrate.

Saturday: The conference starts. It's a lot bigger than I remember, and that's because there are about 50% more attendees (over 1000) than the last one I came to, in 2006. I have trouble locating my friends, so I sit wherever for the first session. It's an excellent speech by writer/illustrator Jarrett J. Krosoczka, who shows a video at the end that has the whole audience screaming with laughter. Next it's editor sessions, where individual editors tell you about the kinds of things they're looking for (or not). You get to choose which editors' sessions to attend, and I usually look for someone from a house that publishes what I tend to write, which is fantasy. Luckily, this year I didn't end up with any editors who said, "Oh, I've done so much fantasy lately I'm kind of sick of it, so I'd rather not see any."

We have a decent lunch (chicken, of course, but not too dry), and the lunch speaker is entertaining, regaling us with tales of how it took him 12 years to develop from wannabe writer into a writer with a book sold. The afternoon speaker is a legendary editor, Richard Jackson, who gives us an inspiring talk filled with literary references and encouragements to make art. We end up with a wine-and-cheese social, which is nice; although the wine was $12 a glass, I made up for it by eating so much cheese and fruit that I didn't have to go out for dinner.

Although these conferences are so big that there really isn't a chance to meet editors or agents, we get an announcement around 3 pm that there is an agent here who's willing to listen to people's pitches. I don't skip my next session to get in line, and by the time I get out at 4 pm, I see the line is 25 people deep. I go to the next talk, and when I come at at 5 pm, the line is still 25 people deep. I have wine and cheese, and by 7 pm the line is still a good 20 people deep. I didn't even try to get in line—I figured if you're the 100th pitch, how is that any different from sending an e-mail? Why spend all that time in line? I'd just feel silly by the time I got up there. (A similar reasoning as why I didn't bother to get perfume autographed by an actor—I don't like feeling silly.)

So all in all, it's been a good conference. I have some good leads for submissions, and some inspiration to keep trying. (Oh, and I got a lot of compliments on my blouse, which I made.) Hopefully, tomorrow's speakers will be just as interesting, but I'll report more on that later.

New York, New York, a wonderful town...

.... assuming I can get myself ready for it, that is. I'm very exciting about attending the SCBWI's winter conference in New York City this weekend. I've been twice before (in 2003 and 2006), and it's a wonderful event. Interesting speakers, hundreds of attendees, all excited about producing children's literature. There's nothing like attending a conference to recharge your creative batteries and motivate to keep working. Big names like Newbery-winner Richard Peck will be there, so you can see why I'm excited about going.

It's just getting ready to leave for the weekend that's driving me crazy. This is my list of things "to-do" today:

1. Do a load of laundry so that Boy doesn't run out of pants before I get back. I've tried to convince him we should buy him some more jeans, but trying to get him to go shopping is like trying to milk a cat.
2. Do some updates for the SCBWI-MI website (I am webmistress)
3. Send out some e-mails to get ready for the upcoming PCMB Craft Fair (I am sign goddess)
4. Make some bake sale treats for both the PCMB show fundraiser and Olympian's testing—oh, and deliver them (I am crazy)
5. Pick up boy from marching band rehearsal
6. Pick up scrip for marching band fundraiser (unfortunately, this can't be done at the same time, so it's two trips to school)
7. Go to band practice
8. Pack (it's so hard to decide what shoes to bring!)
9. Figure out parking at airport, transport from airport to NY hotel, where to spend free time in NYC tomorrow afternoon*
10. Try not to pull out hair or brains.

What the heck am I doing here blathering on? I'll see youse guys later, maybe with same-day reports from NY!

*assuming my flight doesn't get cancelled and I arrive at night, like last time. Thank goodness there's no snow in the forecast.

Hello, Goodbye!

I attended a writers' conference this past weekend. Now I've been to quite a few of these, and I can leave feeling one of two ways: slightly disappointed and discouraged, because I realize I've heard editors say all these things before and I'm still not published; or energized and inspired, because I've heard something new and exciting and I want to get back to work.

This past weekend was one of the latter kind. So this is a short post because I need to get back to some real writing!